Ok… I don’t have a real “Biblical Absurdity of the Day” post, but this is absurd, and I’m posting it today. So it counts.
Deuteronomy 25:11-12 (New International Version)11 If two men are fighting and the wife of one of them comes to rescue her husband from his assailant, and she reaches out and seizes him by his private parts, 12 you shall cut off her hand. Show her no pity.
There are a few things about this I find absurd. First, this was apparently some kind of epidemic problem if someone thought it was necessary not only to make a law about it, but to impose such a severe punishment! What in the world was going on with those crazy Hebrew women, racing about stopping fights by grabbing at their husband’s testicles??
Second, what the hell was God thinking? These laws were all handed down straight from the will of God to the pen of the scribe, right? This was the Old Testament Covenant, which Jesus may or may not have eradicated, depending on which of his conflicting statements you believe. So…
I’m honestly at a loss. What possible state of affairs could have existed in the world such that commanding women’s hands to be severed was the most good and just thing God could think of to solve the problem?